Program Files: Stupid

There are a lot of problems that get under your skin with Microsoft Windows. Let me be clear at the beginning: I do not have Linux installed on any of my machines. As one of my friends once said, "Windows is a good product", and it is. When Windows 98 came out, I thought it was the apex. I slowly and begrudgingly moved to XP (I finally figured out how to turn the Start Menu back to Classic Gray). Now, I am 90% content with my OS.

But there is something that became the norm with Windows 95 (and all subsequent sequels) that all software companies seemed to adopt. I am talking about \Program Files\. Let's break down the old way, first.

Typically, when you installed a game or a piece of software, it needed a new folder. The old way was to type something simple, so it could be quickly typed in command line. Games would be installed in C:\Quake\, so they could be accessed in DOS (via "cd quake", then "quake.exe").

Microsoft decided that the root directory (C:\) had become too cluttered (C:\Windows\ is where the OS is seated). So, they developed a solution (albiet a bad one): Program Files. The horrible thing is that everyone and their dog default installs to Program Files. Without looking I probably have 40 goddamn subfolders in there. They just moved the clutter into an a different closet! Video games, chatting applications and even Microsoft products now have a place in C:\Program Files\i-cant-type-this-right-in-command-line-or-find-it-when-searching\.

Now not all honorable programs want to be in the Prog Files club. mIRC used to be good at this, but they finally caved in. Let me ask two questions: why do you need a separate folder to house third-party (and first-party) apps; and why does it have to use case-sensitive, redundant words?

Let me suggest something for anyone that has more than Solitaire on their systems: C:\games\. I have everything gaming-related here (even oldschool game files). It's easy to type and easy to find. Also, make sure you have a place for downloads (the Desktop is for rookies). I use C:\tasks\, which is easy to find and type. C:\setupfiles\ is where offline copies of all my app installs are.

Another thing about the Desktop. Don't make tons of folders there. Windows buries the Desktop in the root structure, and if you change usernames or login as someone else, expect some downtime and headache.

If you are a developer, understand the KISS principle and stop putting my files into a catchall folder like Program Files!

XP to Vista: the Upgrade saga

I have had a free copy of Windows Vista Upgrade (Home Premium Ed.) laying around since February, 2007. I had hesitated because I didn't need it. There was nothing I desired that wasn't already possible with my XP Media Center Edition 2005 (save for DirectX 10, those stupid desktop gadgets and a reorganized Control Panel). I knew Vista because my previous job had our think tank beta-test it for a month in January, 2007. Fast-forward to now, and need to format my hard drive. It has had much wear and tear, and the list of installs/uninstalls is epic. And I had a plan: multiboot XP and Vista. But, it wasn't going to be as easy as I thought...

XP Format
First, I insert my XP disc and restart. I use the old bluescreen DOS interface (it reminds me of WordPerfect in junior high) to format and do a clean install. I partitioned my hard drive into two parts: 200 GB for XP, and 30 GB for Vista. My idea was to continue using XP, but just use Vista for web surfing and little things. I knew one day I would have to take the Vista plunge, so this was a transition test. Everything went well with the XP install (on Drive C:).

Vista Format
Next, I inserted the Vista disc and restarted. I booted from the CD and expected "good old DOS blue screen", but to my surprise Microsoft overhauled the interface, and the mouse works... Maybe this Windows has something more to offer. So I use the new GUI to select D: drive, and click "Install Now". I walk away after 5 minutes and come back in about 15. I realize the hard drive and CD-ROM aren't doing anything, so I place the mouse cursor on the progress bar (use the mouse pointer to measure if there is any progress made over time). I come back 45 min later, and realize the install hadn't moved. I hit the X button to cancel install, and this doesn't help. I have to hold down the power button and start over. I decide to boot into XP and look at some Microsoft articles...

Vista Format (II)
So, I theorize that my install failed because I'm using a Dell Upgrade of Vista, instead of a retail copy. I decide to insert the disc while XP is running, and install Vista onto D: from there. This method works, and makes progress until it freezes at "Extracting files: 27%..." I watch the 27% for about 30 minutes like an ass, and realize I have to manually power off and try again. I start another theory about my wireless internet fucking things up, because it keeps searching for an access point (and I didn't take the time to disable it). I disable the wireless card and try again. At 27%, I almost shit my pants when it hit 28%. It finally finishes and I think I am out of the woods...

Internet Setup
I am using a Netgear router and a Linksys G card to get my internet fix. The connection worked masterfully for a good 3 months, but I had major, major troubles with both XP and Vista. Before you jump to conclusions, it was human error that made me have a headache for 8 hours. The setup was fine--I just forgot the 3% of the Encryption Key (which I thought I knew by heart).

Current status
Everything is great now. I am still multibooting and mostly using XP (for surfing, downloads and gaming). Vista looks OK, but I don't know how much restriction there will be when I need to do something tricky. It should be noted that boot time for both OS's is almost exactly the same. I think 3 GB of RAM blurs the line.

Tips
If you are reading this because of Windows formatting problems, here is some advice:
1. Always install the older version of Windows first.
2. Unplug all USB shit and disable your wireless connection. You may want to remove any PCI cards (modem, etc) to prevent Device Manager from going apeshit and detecting new hardware.
3. Make a Restore Point almost immediately.
4. Install Service Packs before anything else. (Note: Vista SP1 takes an hour!)
5. Make sure the dual-boot timer is >5 seconds, so you can select which OS you want to run at system startup.

The wrong choice for candidate

The question you should ask yourself is: "who will make the best president?"; not "who should be president". Many people believe BaraqObama is the Kwisatz Haderach--the superbeing. I saw people fucking bawling to Obama's speech at the DNC. Seriously they are going to be shocked when he inevitably fucks up in office. Don't get me wrong. I want to orgasm as much as you do when the votes are in. But, I am guessing he will call a Jewish leader Palestinian or something like that... Two-thirds of Americans will probably hate him by 2012. Machiavellian, maybe?

If Obama gets into office, what will it mean long-term? I guarantee Obama will become clinically depressed. He will sob quietly at night in the White House. The fetal position will be his preferred sleeping pose. At least the Republicans don't to listen to thousands of agendas about saving the whales, supporting gays, preventing war--you have the give them credit for that.

Mark my words: Barack will be clotheslined by D.C. politics. One man can't move mountains in a democratic republic. It is political parties, not individuals, that have the power. Before you start raising hell about those statements, think about the last 8 years, and think about groundbreaking laws and constitutional amendments throughout history. It is mostly congress and the court doing the legwork, dipshits.

Lyric Entry #0002

I'm feeling rough, I'm feeling raw, I'm in the prime of my life.
Let's make some music, make some money, find some models for wives.
I'll move to Paris, shoot some heroin, and fuck with the stars.
You man the island and the cocaine and the elegant cars.

Life Regarding Australia (Part 3 of 137)

There are a few things I will remember about my time at Adventurers Backpackers Resort. One is the noise. Two is the boredom. Three is the pain. The hostel was an old three-story motel, complete with a pool on the 3rd floor. It was sparsely populated in January (the dead part of the season), and the people who lived there were construction workers and miners who were too cheap to live in an apartment. There was a large open rec' room and a gigantic kitchen with gas pilots. All in all, not bad and basically quiet unless you were in the "inner ring" (the rooms facing the parking area). My first room there was a single (in the outer ring), facing the bus stop and the railroad.

The hostel was in the beginnings of the bad part of town. The backpackers was on trendy Palmer Street. This was not a bad street, it just *became* bad about 50 m (learn metric!) from the last fish 'n chips shop. Seedy characters, who did or did not live in the hostel were always roaming around. Resident miners and workers would get shitfaced every night, and sing anthems like soccer hooligans. Being a foreigner in a foreign land, it was kind of frightening. Sometimes it was as scary as Flinders Mall at night (I'll explain later). Palmer St. also had a "men's hostel" nearby that was unbecoming, and parallel was the Railway Estates. The construction workers felt right at home, maybe because at 6 AM they would walk next door and resume hammering and banging on a new condo project. The noise.

Basically I worked 9-5, and the rest of the time was free. I didn't make any friends (it wasn't the friendliest hostel), so I was sure glad I brought my Gameboy Advance. There was not much to do if you didn't have a car or bike. Taxis weren't cheap, and the city had a tendency to favour those with wheels. The malls were too far away. The beach was a 30-min walk, Flinders St was 10-min, the cinema was 20-min, the ferry was 30-min (explained later) and the rock pool was a solid hour. The first few days in the hostel, I walked around in my beloved Van skate shoes. Those started to hurt me, so I bought some thongs (sandals) and figured I would be good. Not so. There was a lot of fucking walking without wheels. Eventually, I got the stamina and the callouses, but in the meantime, I had to bide my time staring at cinder block walls in my room, and try to write a little and read a little. I played Castlevania: Aria of Sorrow, Metroid Fusion and Legend of Zelda: The Minish Cap all the way through. The boredom and the pain.

(continued...)

Lyric Entry #0001

Beyond the palace hemi-powered drones scream down the boulevard
The girls comb their hair in rearview mirrors
And the boys try to look so hard
The amusement park rises bold and stark
Kids are huddled on the beach in a mist

Life Regarding Australia (Part 1 of 137)

Tonight, before I settled down to bed with a cup of tea and a ratty novel, I told my friend that there is no such thing as nonfiction. History books, scientific journals, autobiographies--they can't be 100% truthful. We are human and we embellish; we lie to save ourselves. I'm worried about the audience on this one. I want to entertain.

Before I over-reflect on my statement, I must go on and do this before it gets replaced by new adventures. I must write about the beginning, the middle and the climax (hopefully not in that order). I must write about Life Regarding Australia. Everything from here on is "nonfiction". Where do I start?

(continued...)