The Advanced Theory of Rock: Who is Advanced?

Advanced Theory is an idea about musicians we like and the choices they make that we hate. It is very hard to explain, much like quantum physics. The following is a (chat log) discussion (between me and old friend Eddie Tomayko) and introduction to the concept. It should be noted that I was drunk, but lucid.

(11:37:50 PM) maximumsp: [Billy] corgan has become... i dont know what
(11:38:03 PM) maximumsp: something to loathe?
(11:38:29 PM) maximumsp: have you heard of Advanced Theory?
(11:38:45 PM) lemon031: i wouldnt say that but he's fallen into that hole a lot of once huge artists do... where they think they can collaborate with whoever and put out gold when in fact it's just shit
(11:38:50 PM) lemon031: no
(11:39:20 PM) maximumsp: Advanced Theory is perplexing... it basically states that any artist who does something terrible is advanced to a higher level
(11:39:34 PM) maximumsp: i dont understand Lou Reed to this day, but he is Advanced.
(11:39:42 PM) maximumsp: so is Val Kilmer, according to the theorists
(11:39:55 PM) maximumsp: i shouldnt have used the word 'any'
(11:40:06 PM) lemon031: lol
(11:40:22 PM) lemon031: so let me think of someone who qualifies
(11:40:25 PM) lemon031: hmm
(11:40:46 PM) lemon031: bruce campbell?
(11:40:53 PM) maximumsp: someone who does something disappointing or uncharacteristic
(11:41:01 PM) maximumsp: i would have to think about Bruce...
(11:41:03 PM) lemon031: i guess he doesnt count
(11:41:11 PM) lemon031: bc it was meant as farce
(11:41:27 PM) lemon031: how about isiah thomas post playing days
(11:41:39 PM) maximumsp: dont know enough about him anymore
(11:42:04 PM) lemon031: just a comically terribad coach/gm of the knicks
(11:42:22 PM) maximumsp: trying to remember what i read
(11:42:54 PM) maximumsp: trying to pick a sports star that fits the theory
(11:43:17 PM) lemon031: manny
(11:43:19 PM) maximumsp: i would say Shaq, but i dunno sports arent my forte
(11:43:24 PM) maximumsp: holy shit youre right
(11:43:25 PM) maximumsp: MAN RAM
(11:43:30 PM) lemon031: lol
(11:43:36 PM) maximumsp: fucking noble
(11:43:37 PM) lemon031: nah shaq doesnt fit
(11:44:17 PM) lemon031: im trying to think of a political example
(11:44:21 PM) maximumsp: Bob Dylan selling out for a Victoria's Secret commerical = ADVANCED
(11:44:33 PM) lemon031: lol def
(11:44:33 PM) maximumsp: http://advancedtheory.blogspot.com

(11:46:06 PM) lemon031: politics has to be sarah barracuda
(11:46:18 PM) maximumsp: hmm maybe
(11:46:24 PM) lemon031: who else can quit their job and be about to get rich as shit
(11:46:39 PM) maximumsp: i think one of the rules is that you have to have an un-ironic mullet at some point... so that discounts her
(11:46:51 PM) lemon031: hahaha
(11:47:21 PM) lemon031: well look at her hairdos back from her early sportscaster days. looks like "the real housewives of 1983 new jersey"
(11:47:40 PM) maximumsp: i gotta write this shit down
(11:47:56 PM) lemon031: haha
(11:48:12 PM) lemon031: newt gingrich
(11:48:14 PM) maximumsp: i wish i had my book here so i could read passages
(11:48:20 PM) maximumsp: i dunno about Newt
(11:48:28 PM) lemon031: no hear me out
(11:48:49 PM) lemon031: heads up the contract with america, hammers clinton for fucking monica lewinsky
(11:48:59 PM) lemon031: ends up he's cheating on like his 3rd wife
(11:49:15 PM) lemon031: ends up near the head of the party today
(11:49:24 PM) lemon031: could say the same about rush limbaugh too
(11:49:54 PM) maximumsp: i dunno what Rush did that was advanced
(11:50:07 PM) maximumsp: painkillers?
(11:50:15 PM) lemon031: railed on drug users for being weak minded forever and then turns out he's a pillhead
(11:50:22 PM) lemon031: now he's bigger (pun intended) than ever
(11:50:55 PM) maximumsp: there's also something called OVERT in the theory, that means something hypocritical is done that isnt advanced
(11:51:08 PM) maximumsp: so Rush is overt, because he is TRYING to be advanced

Thief Gold on a modern system

[Taking a break from music videos for a short, short time.]

I hate how gaming companies try to resolve problems via an online forum or messageboard. Posts get deprecated so easily, and sifting through the replies is a chore. Isn't the internet supposed to make life easier?


Thief: the Dark Project is one of the best first-person shooter ideas ever. It's innovative and epic. One of the best things is that there are no guns. Ingenious.

However, this ten-year-old game is feeling the effects of the Computer Age, and my copy takes a little fixing on my system.

Part A: Installing Thief


Speaking of deprecated... computer game installers are notorious for becoming obsolete approximately 10 seconds after they ship. DirectX (aka Direct3D) is making leaps and bounds, and leaving all the old stuff drowning in the wake of incompatibility. Thief Gold is one of those casualties. If you obtain the older discs for this game, here is how to play them on a newer computer system.

The fix:

1. In Windows, open the Run application (shortcut is Windows Key + R).
   
2. Type in x:\setup -lgntforce
3. Click OK
4. Install Thief without problems.
   

Part B: Playing Thief without freezes

Intel's Hyperthreading technology chewed this game and its sequel to bits. There is a quick, non-permanent fix (which gets tedious), and there is a long-term resolution to playing Thief Gold on a Pentium.

The (short-term) fix:

1. Open Task Manager (for later).
2. Run the Thief executable (THIEF.EXE).
3. Immediately Alt+Tab (or Window key) out of the game.
4. Find THIEF.EXE under the Processes tab in Task Manager.
5. Right-click on the Image Name and choose "Set Affinity".
6. Un-check one of the CPU's and click OK.
7. Alt-Tab back into the game and play.
8. Repeat every time the game is run.
   

The (long-term) fix:

• Read and follow this website's instructions.
  

I just ordered Thief II. I can't wait to tackle its problems!

Links:
* http://www.thief4.com
* http://www.thief-thecircle.com
* http://www.neilstuff.com/thief/run-thief-with-no-cd.htm

Faith No More -- a music video retrospective

Because this San Fransisco band just recently announced reformation (and performed live), I decided to quickly cover Faith No More's best three videos in one quick shot. We have, of course "Epic"; and then the lesser known "Everything's Ruined" and "Last Cup of Sorrow" from their career's prime and twilight, respectively.

In 1990, Faith No More's "Epic" put them on the rock 'n roll map. The band seemed poised to overcome the "hair metal hangover" with an innovative rap-rock design--they might have been the Nirvana of the 1990s, if grunge hadn't come around (I'm not placing blame at all).



1989
Dir: Ralph Ziman
The video is simply a sound stage performance with a rain machine, intermixed with kooky visuals and special effects. Mike Patton's head explodes, Jim Martin's guitar is struck by lightning, a piano is blown to bits... pretty cool. I am obligated to write about the fish (or Bjork's fish, whatever), that provoked outrage for its flopping footage. Silly.



1992
Dir: Kevin Kerslake
More interesting is the video for "Everything's Ruined". It's one of those stock footage montage clips that are so common. But this one is so odd that it's worth noting. This one pits the band against the green screen, fighting and swimming with the clips. It's fun to watch them in their element.

"Whatzupwitu" -- a music video retrospective

This post has been moved to:

http://lifeasamusicvideo.blogspot.com/2009/07/music-video-retrospective.html